Fork in the Road

Four years ago this week, God empowered me to make the most significant move of my life. I was at a turning point. I had everything I thought I wanted regarding my relationships, music was my work, play, and schooling, but...

BUT...

that strong 3 letter word interrupts, it halts you, it frames a good thing into a bad thing, or at least, a not-so-good thing...

I had everything I thought I wanted, but I didn't have peace in the depths of my heart and soul. I kept making choices and moving in a direction that was against what God wanted of me. My prayers were full of me asking for His direction, and all the while, I was quenching the Holy Spirit. He was telling me exactly what He wanted, and I didn't agree, so I'd push Him away in my disobedience. I was the ultimate dichotomy. Romans 7 speaks to the struggle inside all of us to choose what is right, and it offers us HOPE. HE knows we can't do what is right on our own - it's HARD, that's why His Holy Spirit helps us, gives us a nudge.

It is only the power of God within me that moved me 2,500 miles away to California. I knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that God was calling me to follow Him on faith alone, and it was the scariest moment of my life. I remember loading up my car with my keyboard and clothes, took one long look at my house, and said goodbye to the life I knew. My life was about to change dramatically.



I had just a few hundred dollars to my name when I finally drove into CA after 3 days on the road. I found a beauty school and enrolled right away. My brother's 400 sq. ft. apartment had just enough room for my twin air mattress, and that's where I lived for 3 months. No matter how many blankets I'd bury myself in, I could never, ever get warm. My brother didn't own a tv, so we watched "The Simpsons" DVD collection. The light on his computer (right next to my head) was so bright that I'd block it with a pillow every night. Little did I know, I was actually overheating his computer and totally busted it! Amber moved to CA a few months after I did, and for 2 weeks, she and I did our best to share a sleeping palette on brother Jay's floor. Needless to say, we all agreed it was time for sissy and I to go somewhere else. We went on to share an apartment and ended up with free beds and a tv...and no other furniture. We hosted a party with friends and had about 20 people - all sitting on the floor - having a wonderful time. And that was the night my new friend, JT, and I started talking - just the two of us.

"You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness,
That my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent.
O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever. "
Psalm 30:11


*Amber and I visiting sister Amanda in Texas on our LONG road trip*

Amber and I went on to have many more adventures, and I dealt with hard seasons of unemployment, and I was always BROKE! I'd work my tail off with multiple jobs, and even though I didn't have money for any extras, God was so faithful to provide for my needs as only He can. This road of obedience was full of hard work, giving up my comforts (my own bed, my own room, etc.), and lonely at times, but walking with God and being obedient was truly like breathing fresh air...it was so refreshing and good for my soul. Eventually, the Lord saw fit to bring some great work experiences, a wonderful husband, a beautiful home (though I still don't have my own bed!), and I'm still hoping to bring home my kitty from NC someday. ;)


"I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through Him who gives me strength."
Philippians 4:11-13

"But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness."
I Timothy 6:6-11

Daily, we find ourselves at forks in the road. With every single action, thought, or decision, we have options for how we react. Will your heart be bitter, ungrateful, or complaining? Or will you be gracious, thankful, and encouraging? Will you do the right thing even if it's the hard thing? Will you give in to temptation or will you flee it? No matter what, you can't do it alone. Romans 8 says Christ set us free from sin. If you believe Him, the very same power that raised Christ from the dead lives within you and it is that very same power that will guide you when you are faced with the fork in the road.


*Amber and I on her wedding day in July 2010.*


*My husband and I on our wedding day in November 2010.*